Living THIS Life...

wilderness...thoughts

2008-07-07T14:17:00.000-07:00

24 hours in a van. Through 6 states, surviving 1 warning from a Kansas state trooper named JC Smith and NOT surviving another from a local Colorado officer named “Bowman”, 7 DB high school guys, Scottie and myself headed for Wilderness Ranch. We were on a road trip, just us dudes, headed to the Rockies. John Denver and every country music song that you could fit into a 24 hour drive poured from the speakers as we sang our hearts out on the road. Van rides are always interesting, you learn so much about a person that’s nestled up in your personal space for that long. It was a pleasure to spend it with our high school friends. We talked about our families, our girlfriends/ wives, our days in high school; heck, we even got into a discussion about the definition of true FAITH. Several of us had watched the movie “Lonesome Dove” before leaving, so we aptly named our van (after a horse) and our GPS (after a woman) in the movie (you’ll have to watch the movie for the name).

24 hours in a van. Oh, the smell. Don’t even try to imagine. It was glorious! We stepped out into the fresh, cool, thin, Colorado air and immediately began packing our packs for the trip. The guys were excited, nervous a little, not knowing what to expect, but excited nonetheless. We were about to spend the next 6 days out in the wilderness. No shower, no toilet paper, no change of clothes, no ipod, no cell phones, no distractions, no noise. We were about to experience God in the glory of His creation! A typical day consisted of waking up with frost on the ground, eating breakfast, breaking down camp, packing your 50+lb. pack, walking in the sunshine in shorts and a t-shirt until lunch, sharing life stories over some pizza bagels, “meat and cheese”, apples, etc, packing up, walking in the rain/snow for a little while, arriving at camp around 4 or 5pm, setting up camp, having quiet time, eating dinner and looking at the stars or going to sleep.
The great thing about each day is that relationship was not only central but vital to survival. We each carried food for the week, we helped each other when we fell, we talked about life and sometimes we were all silent…COMPLETELY silent.

God was not only revealing Himself in our surroundings, but in the way we served each other. When one got sick, we stopped and helped lighten his load. When one couldn’t bear the weight of the pack any more, all of us took some of the burden on our backs. When Scottie got very ill on Tuesday and had to be evacuated, Jesus showed up in my high school friends. They all got up at 4:45 AM and hugged and said their goodbyes to Scottie. To me, it was a picture, a picture of Jesus’ love for each one of us. He who was without sin BECAME sin on our behalf. My high school friends, who I have had the privilege to know and become friends with over the past 4 years, were living a picture of Jesus!

One of the most beautiful things in the world is to watch God reveal Himself to people in ways they can understand. So God shows up in the Rockies. God shows up in the lives of high school students loving on their leader. God shows up in Scripture in such a way that, when explained, a student looks into your eyes and says, “That makes sense, NOW I get it!” It’s why we do what we do at Young Life. It’s why we pray and plan and show up in the lives of our friends.

so...i met a new friend today

2008-03-19T12:14:00.000-07:00

as most of you know, i try to regularly visit the high school to hang out with students, meet new ones and just generally be seen. as of late i've been really struggling with going...partly because of time doing other, more "important" things like, writing a sermon for "big church"... or, planning a retreat...or, keeping track of finances for camp...or, having endless meetings about stuff i don't need to be involved in but because i haven't quite learned how to say 'no' yet always find myself in the middle of...(try reading that sentence with one breath).

anyway, today, just like every other Wednesday the past few weeks, there was this battle going on inside my head between what i know to be important and what i've let myself be fooled into thinking is important. Namely, going to the cafeteria and risk the rejection of high schoolers having a bad day. (just as a side note...i still haven't figured out why being thirty in the cafeteria is not much different than being sixteen in the cafeteria, still feel inferior, still feel awkward, still feel like everybody is looking at your zits, still checking your fly 100 times just to make sure, etc)

rewind to two days earlier. A high school dude I know was driving around town with a girl who was new at school and decided to stop by the office and introduce her...she came in, we shook hands, i asked her her name, she told me, and that was it...

fast forward to today. I'm sitting in my car outside the cafeteria, praying to God that when I walk in that place, students would see, feel, and experience Jesus in their midst. That through a smile or handshake or remembrance of a name, the Holy Spirit would spring up in them a recognition of something new and different and more intriguing than anything they've ever experienced before, and the God would use that to reveal Himself to them...

so, careful to perform the usual zit check in the rearview mirror, i walk in the cafeteria of about 500 students...in the next 90 minutes, i will be facing over 2000 students...i am certainly careful to check my zipper one last time...

this is how God works, in the midst of 2000 students, i see her, its the new girl, the one who i just met two days earlier for 30 seconds...she walked right by me...as she passed something inside me reached out and stretched out my arm and tapped her on the shoulder...she turned...I smiled...she smiled back...I said, "hi, it's good to see you"...

What she said I will never forget...no student in my 4 years of going to the high school has ever said what she said, but somehow, it's what every single one of them is screaming on the inside...

She said, "You noticed me."

it's been a while

2008-01-02T12:25:00.000-08:00

just a quick something on what I have been thinking on for the past few months...I can't remember what got me started, but I have recently gotten the fever to thru- hike the appalachian trail. i know, it's crazy, but i think it should be done...by me...before I am two old or sick or dead to do it...anyway...her is a new picture i took from the top of Cedar Mountain on Christmas Eve...its probably the coolest picture this idiot has ever snapped...

also, randomly....saw the movie "I Am Legend" and loved it! it's freaky and I spent roughly 3/4 of the movie fighting off a heart attack but the redemptive qualities shown are worth seeing and talking about...

road trip '07

2007-10-04T09:47:00.000-07:00

this past summer my dad, my father-in-law and I went on a road trip...here are my journal entries for those three days. and pictures. not that you care:

July 26, 2007

let me first say how thankful I am to God that I have a father AND a father-in-law. and they like each other. i imagine this trip will be treasured in all of our hearts. the day began with coffee at our house. the destination: Bedford, VA and the National D-Day monument. conversation included Tennessee's upcoming football season, the lack of appreciation & knowledge of American history by the younger generations (i hope and pray Jack learns to appreciate his heritage and the sacrifice made for him to be free, both in America and spiritually) stories were told of the father's fathers history in growing up and their involvement in WWII.

next stop: Lexington,Va. Lee chapel, Lee residence at Washington and Lee, Marshall museum on VMI campus, Jackson residence, Jackson gravesite.

the tour at the Jackson home was excellent. the lady guiding us was very good and very dedicated to her post, which was probably a volunteer position. she was older and it was fun to watch her dedication to the details of her job. She faded the lights as the movie began at the beginning of the tour and waited until the credits were over before carefully fading the lights back up and continuing on with the tour. you just don't see that much anymore.

Jackson home: Jackson began every day in prayer, a brisk walk, THEN returned at 7am for family prayer and breakfast. he had a digestive problem and thought being upright helped so he studied his classroom lectures standing up. he sat in a chair facing the wall and recited his lectures to his wife until he had them word for word. self discipline was this guy's forte: spiritual, mental, physical.

After checking into our hotel, we pulled the cooler out by the pool and talked until dinner. topics included the mystery of the female mind and crazy stories from our own histories. then it was to Applebee's for dinner. We sat at the bar (like all Christ followers should) there we met, not a "woman at the well", but a man. in conversation I believe God was glorified. relationship was central. it's fun to watch your heroes engage someone with no pretense, no judgements, but with a genuine desire to just be themselves and get to know and love their neighbor...buy him a beer, hunker down and do life with the people that come to the "well". to be continued...

birthdays, my wife, and the love of God...

2007-09-27T11:21:00.000-07:00

birthdays are good. my wife is great. Lensey and my mom managed to co-plan a surprise 30th birthday party for me while nine months pregnant. she even lied to my face and led me to believe that we were going to the captains table on watauga lake to eat dinner. we walked in my parents house to "drop the kids off"...literally (not poop) and there were most of my favorite people in the whole world. and we laughed and ate chicken wings and told stories and laughed some more. somehow when stories are told of me, almost 94% percent of them involve nudity on my part. i like to think it's someone else's idea to get naked, but when the story is told out loud, it sure sounds like someone else came up with a great idea to do some spontaneous random thing, but it's always me who has to add, "you know what would be even better....if we did it NAKED!"

anyway, it was good times. but the interesting thing is that for the past month or so, i've felt very lonely, alone, by myself. no friends, no family, no God, nobody. but then Jack came, and my phone didn't stop ringing for a week because people called to check on us, and people from church signed up for three weeks to bring us dinner, and my friend Josh wrote me from Orphan Helpers with an encouraging note, and I had a birthday, and people showed up at a party and had stoies to tell on me, and my friend Ryan said he hopes that we are friends for a long time, and one of my former students thanked me for investing in his life, and liz and curtis post-it noted my car (see picture), and chris gave me a card that played the Bewitched theme song and read, "your magic makes me tingle".

And so God showed up in all these ways and finally I had no choice but to realize that it is not God that goes somewhere, but me who walks away. and the passage that says, "as for me, the nearness of God is my good" started to make sense. because life sucks when we walk away from God like we have it all together and we don't need anybody. but I ask myself "why?" why do i walk away? i walk away without even knowing it. i start feeling like crap and still don't recognize the fact that i have turned a cold shoulder to the nearness of God. i sure wish i could trust only in that passage, I guess i'll just have to keep saying it over and over in my head.

friends...

2007-09-11T19:44:00.000-07:00

you know, i'm sitting here nestled up against my screen door so I can steal my neighbors wireless, and that little lump camp up in my throat as I thought about my friends. Over the past several years, my "friendships" have changed drastically. I've lost friends to heaven and to circumstances. I got married and a new season began for me so I felt like I was losing my unmarried friends, bert passed away, other relationships that were strong faded for one reason or another, ministry only leaves so many minutes in a day to continue relationships.

But today I rejoice in the friendships I have, new and old that, even in the past few months, have sprouted new leaves and are gathering water to strengthen again. Richie and I have been talking more, Pat too. Chris as my office mate. that dude challenges me and I like it. and the monday night basketball dudes have been a real blessing and treat. todd bell is good. John Fooshee, who has probably been THE most influential person in my life the past five years, is around more...at cracker barrell and panera anyway.

So, if you read this, thank you from the bottom of my heart, i'll tell you to your face, but we're dudes and it might get mushy. Thanks.

more on jack..and a sermon quote

2007-09-11T19:12:00.000-07:00

Here are a few more pics of jack's first week of life. He is very pleasant (so far) and we all love having him around. He is already cracking us up with his faces. It's pretty special having a son. Laynie is doing well but has some jealous moments. She and I have been spending alot of time together because of obvious reasons. I think she's ready to have her mommy back. Before all this happened, I was worried how I would love another as much as I love Laynie. It is truly God breathed. I felt full of love with Laynie, like I had nothing else to give. There is no doubt God gives you what you need: patience, endurance, comfort, love, energy, etc. There is no stinking way we could do this without His guiding arms wrapped around us.

"Yes, my sister's lips are permanently attached to my face. It's a little annoying."

Jack w/ his Uncle Dick

Chris walked straight in and started teaching Jack how to sing.

One last thing and I'll shut up: This week we opened a series on I Peter. It is written to believers that were scattered all over asia minor in hopes of encouraging them to "live by faith in a world of un-faith." The idea is this, decide that you are going to put all your eggs in the Jesus basket...ALL THE TIME. Who said that, Bobby said that...

ladies and gentleman, my son....

2007-09-05T18:42:00.000-07:00

today has been a day. Jack Matthew Richardson has entered the world and when he came out, it looked alot like Laynie. I can't write alot now. It's 10pm and I'm sitting outside Panera Bread blogging. But I thought I would post some pics for you.

Without a doubt the most amazing sights these eyes have ever seen.

tomorrow....

2007-09-04T08:36:00.000-07:00

Tomorrow we are scheduled, well, Lens is scheduled, to be induced at 6 am. "nervous" and "excited" are words that come to mind. nervous for Lensey and the baby during delivery, nervous for Laynie and her reaction to a new face that will be getting grandparents attention, nervous because I am responsible for showing my son how to be a man of God.

See, with Laynie there are certainly things I can teach her: how to be independent, the fact that all farting is funny, laughter is the serious business of heaven, all men are pigs except for me and her two granddads, how she should be treated when the whole boy thing starts happening (you can start praying now that she converts to Catholicism and becomes a nun), and that her mom is the greatest friend and person on the face of the planet.

But for a son? the challenge i accept only on the fact that my God is with me.

Tomorrow we meet the second Jack Richardson I have ever known. the first was my grandfather, my dad's dad. He was a great man and good friend to me for the first thirteen years of my life. His story is wild, and I can only pray that the new Jack pursues God with the same wildness that the old Jack experienced. Are you excited? I am.
Tomorrow you get to meet Jack Matthew Richardson.
Tomorrow another Richardson enters the world.
Tomorrow we get to witness the miracle of God's beautiful creation.
Tomorrow we get to smell heaven.
Tomorrow we start a new chapter.
Tomorrow the track changes from 3 to 4.
Tomorrow.

my love...

2007-08-29T10:32:00.000-07:00

I don't have much to say right now, but my good friend Chris took this picture of Laynie and I think it's awesome...We were praying at a baptism and she was on my shoulders. I know, I'm bias...........i don't care.

I also love my sister-in-law VERY much.

the wisdom of my friend...

2007-08-24T06:43:00.000-07:00

this morning i meet with john fooshee to talk about my talents and strenghts and how to develop and utilize them to the max. there is something serious going on in my life right now, but i can't explain it. and when i can't explain it, john seems to help put the pieces together in a real, personable, friendly way. i was instructed to come up with 15 things in my life, from birth to the present, that i have BOTH loved AND been good at. i came up with 10:

1. Basketball
2. Friendships/ Relationships
3. Words- Reading- Language
4. Communication
5. Competition
6. Acting/ Drama/ Characters
7. Being a dad
8. Being a husband
9. Youth Ministry
10. Discipleship

oh, well. so we met, talked and he asked questions about the stories behind each one of the ten things. here's are some of the themes we came up with, from a simple conversation:

Themes: I am drawn to the challenge of being involved in people's lives.
I most desire to understand people for the purpose of helping them live life to the full.

We also came up with some environments I thrive in: Team, High Energy, Group environments where I'm up front so that I can build into lives one-on- one later, places where the coach or leader values me over the task at hand, and being outside. more on this later...

God in my shower...

2007-08-22T08:34:00.000-07:00

In my life, it seems the only still, quiet place is the shower. And so I've been trying to meditate on things above while I'm washing. Acouple nights ago, God showed up and laid on my mind a question that Lensey told me she asked Laynie today. The answer is what got me, though. They were driving around and Laynie was asking 1,000 questions, (she's 2 and a half) and Lens said, "Where are all these questions coming from?!" Laynie thought for a minute and then said, "Ummm, they're coming from God."
And so God started teaching me in the shower.
If God is giving my little girl questions, my response shouldn't be impatience or frustration, because that shows her I'm not interested in what she' interested in. No, my responsibility is to see that God is giving me opportunities to point my daughter to Him! By answering her questions (even if I don't know the answer) I'm teaching her that God, and me are interested in everything in her little world and we will always be available to listen to her and answer her questions.
Is that not how God feels towards us? We question, we doubt, we inquire and He sits, listens, answers, and responds with compassion and love.
Thank you God for showing me something new about You in the shower. Grant me the brains to remember this forever. May You use this experience some day for Your glory.

Another shot...

2007-08-22T08:31:00.000-07:00

So i'm going to give this blogging thing another shot and see how it goes. If I truly suck at it and you are really my friend, you'll tell me...and I'll stop. Read if you dare.

Thoughts on Forgiveness...

2006-06-02T19:40:00.000-07:00

we forgive others because God forgave us. but we have the curse of sin. so it is only through our faith in jesus that we have the power to forgive. our finite minds cannot fathom the depth of God's love for us. we understand only what we have experienced ourselves. i feel i have experienced God's forgiveness through other people. my past caused pain and hurt to those closest to me, and yet they always received me with open arms. never questioning. never ridiculing. never judging or preaching. just loving me.

how did they get to that point? that understanding of love. did they experience it themselves? i know that they were forever praying for me; lifting me up to God. total trust, man. total trust.

so by the example of forgiveness that they gave, i came to deeper understanding of just how deep the Father's love for us truly is. so many times over and over, the devil tricks us into thinking we can forgive on our own. that we have the capacity in our souls to forgive. to trust. to completely forget. on our own. with no help.

reality is the foot of the cross. that connection that we have through faith in what the cross represents is all we've got. do we dare say we need anyhting else? how do you tell students this and expect them to understand when the only way you have understanding is through God's graceful giving of Jesus? Ephesians 6 says "out of His glorious riches", His unlimited resources do we obtain the strength to forgive, to love. may we continue to experience God as to be "filled to the measure" of of His fullness.

Laynie and Daddy day...

2006-05-12T13:22:00.000-07:00

Fridays are "Laynie and daddy" days at our house. There is nothing I look forward to more than hanging out with Laynie on Fridays. We go shopping for new tennis shoes, go to "Donalds" (her name for McD's), go visit Mee-Mee (my mom) and pet the horses, read books, play with toys and swing and play in the backyard.

I think God teaches me more about Himself and my part in His story on "Fridays" than any other time during the week. This week, I was thinking about how much Laynie trusts me for everything in her life. When we go somewhere, she trusts that I am not going to leave her there; when we go outside to play, she stays close because she knows I am going to protect her and show her a good time and teach her all about outside and all the wonderful things that are available to her. It makes me think of our faith and helps me understand how I am to be with my Father: totally dependent, joyful in all things, engaged in His Word, ever mindful of His beauty in creation.

Another thing I learned from my daughter today is the joy it brings to peoples lives when you take the time to look them in the eye, acknowledge they are alive and simply say hello. No matter where we go on Fridays, Laynie is always saying "hi" to people. We pass people going into Target, she says hello; walking down the aisles, "HI"; pull up to the cash register, "hi" and "bye". She is setting an example. Witht the faith of a child, there are no judgements, no insecurities, no qualms about what they will think about her. She just simply sees them as people like her who NEED to be talked to, recognized, LOVED.

I don't know...

2006-05-01T13:21:00.000-07:00

I don't know why I am doing this. I have friends on this thing that write hilarious, thought provoking and sometimes useless things. My friends Johnny and Beth T have a blog and it needs to be published, it is that good. My hopes are that this can be another way to join in community with those people that I never get to see, but am connected to by the Cross; that it might be another "tool" to engage in the lives of people I don't know but love just because they are. Maybe we can do life together sometime...